SCRIBE: How may I help youse over dere ‘n stuff?
CUSTOMER:I need to stop service on my phone.
SCRIBE: Ok, I’ll be more than happy to go ahead and…
CUSTOMER: Some weirdo got into my house and stole my phone last night.
SCRIBE: I’m sorry to hear that. Well, we can definitely suspend the phone for you. Have you ever had this done before?
CUSTOMER: No.
SCRIBE: Ok. You have two options whenever you suspend a line. We can do it with or without billing.
CUSTOMER: (Heavy sigh) Well, I…
SCRIBE: Basically, if we suspend with billing you’ll pay your monthly amount and the phone will be unusable. If we do it without billing, the days without billing will extend your contract by that same amount of days up to 30. The phone stays suspended regardless.
CUSTOMER: That sounds like the one for me, then.
SCRIBE: OK, this will make the phone unable to make or receive calls. He also won’t be able to activate it anywhere else because it is on our stolen list unless you call back and have it removed.
CUSTOMER: Good. ‘Cause this guy just came into my house last night and stole it.
SCRIBE: Wow. Did he steal anything else?
CUSTOMER: Ummmm, not that I know of. I don’t know where this guy came from, dude. He was hiding in a closet.
SCRIBE: He…
CUSTOMER: He was in my kids’s room, dude. I don’t know even know who this fucking weirdo was. I’m sorry, I don’t mean to curse…
SCRIBE: Perfectly understandable.
CUSTOMER: He just took my phone and walked out with it. And I know he’s got it, ‘cause I called and he answered it.
SCRIBE: Then we definitely need to suspend that phone right now.
CUSTOMER: Yeah. I mean, I ran down to my mom’s house down the street in the freezing cold.
SCRIBE: Wow.
CUSTOMER: But it can’t be used at all now?
SCRIBE: That’s correct. Only you can have us reactivate the handset at this point.
From there we discussed replacement options and how to file an insurance claim, none of which is very interesting or relevant to this post. Between this and the psycho-Santa that murdered his family members with gunfire and quick burn incendiary devices, this was quite the Xmas, was it not? It will probably be unsurprising to most of if not all of you that I was inspired by this horrible experience to write a short story. Ah, customers. May you always sow manure upon the fertile plains of my imagination!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
why do people go absolutely psycho at Christmas time? God I could write a real life story of my own but I will control myself for the time being...
Yay for the psychos that make life interesting.....
POLICEMAN: Sirs, excuse me, but while legally wiretapping this customer servieman's line, I decided to do a GPS scan for the whereabouts of said phone. It seems he's back in your house again. Get ouuuut!!!
well, apparently there were some eagerly awaiting a Scribe post after all.
LOL, the fun times you have at work. I envy you!
Post a Comment