POST #200- AGAIN!

This is not my first post #200, since this blog was started over in 2008 due to prying eyes locating its predecessor. You might want to reference this classic post (http://scribesorganizedchaos.blogspot.com/2008/12/great-betrayal-or.html)before reading ahead...

I ain't got all day muhfuka, daaamnnn!!!!

Okay, finally. Here's the latest.

As I wrote in that post, I decided to bide my time and wait until Senor Bitch-ass fucked up royal. I thought it would take longer than it did, but his latin lustfulness apparently cannot be caged. Finally, after two more years of pretending to like him the few times we saw him and watching him send his little cutesy-poo text messages to you-know-who, he did the unthinkable.

He called drunk one night supposedly leaving a work party alone. He didn't call me, his male friend at this late hour, he called her.

"Ed?" she said.
"Yesssss," he slurred.
"Are you okay?"
"Yesssss."
"Are you drunk?"
"Yesssss."
"Do you need to come over?"
"Umm...yesssss."

Former EFB decided she would not be in the immediate vicinity when he walked in. When I opened the door, I was a bit shocked. I'd never seen him look so fucked up. His eyes danced around in his head like two dark brown marbles, his was complexion splotchy and he reeked of booze. I took him into the family room and sat down and started interrogating him. We thought there had been some trouble with his woman and he needed to reach out and talk to someone.

The jury's still out on that because as soon as former EFB walked in, his eyes took on a different sort of glaze and began roaming up and down her. We asked him repeatedly if there was trouble at home and he denied it, then said, "Damn woman. Damn life," over and over.

We didn't understand why she'd allowed him to go to a work party where there was liquor and vagina around within her, but she did. She has apparently had it with his drinking and is indulging in some misguided tough love. I suppose if he'd crashed into soemthing and died, that would have been the toughest love of all. True there would've been one less bitch-ass sell-out in the world, but she seems to have a fondness for him.

Eventually, we insisted that he either crash on the couch in the den or we take his drunk ass home. He agreed to allow this so I went into the bedroom and started putting on my outdoor clothes. From the living room, I could hear former EFB laughing uncomfortably and yelling Ed's name over and over. Later, I would discover that he'd made some awkward move on her where he basically said, "Let's just do it right here," and pressed her against the wall. Being a martial artist, she was in no danger but the point was the real Ed was finally coming out.

I decided to drive Ed in his car while she followed behind. As we left the house, Ed jumped in the car with her as I got in his car and backed around my own so she could get out. As soon as she cleared the driveway, Ed hopped out of her car and got in with me.

During the drive to his house, a fucking thirty minute minute at elevenm o'clock on a weeknight drive I might add, he effectively shot himself in the foot. He asked me if I wanted to see naked pictures of his wife in exchange for some of Former EFB. He offered to switch women with me. He asked me if I minded if he "molested" Former EFB and was baffled when I said yes. He told me he thinks the world of Former EFB and that I knew that. He then said I should marry her because he loves her.

JACKPOT, BITCH!!! Keep talkin'...

And he did, until his wife called wondering where he was. She decided to stay up until he got home. I pulled his car into the garage and decided to go knock on the door and tell her what happened. I knocked and rang the bell for about five minutes but she never answered. Meanwhile, Ed was putting more nails in his coffin.

Standing next to Former EFB's car, he told her he loved her and begged her to have us all hang out that weekend. He then stroked her hair and kissed her hand. According to her, he seemed to come to his senses a bit and realize what he was doing as his head rose. Suddenly, he had to go and go fast.

Now, you might think Former EFB would never want to see him again after that. Most women I know would have ended the supposed friendship right then and there. But for some reason she claims to understand it. "All my male friends have developed feelings for me," she said.

"Did they all try to fuck you in a hallway?" I asked.

Despite my insistence that it doesn't matter what he feels, she is willing to overlook this incident because he was drunk. Besides, it is her contention that Ed doesn't take me seriously in all this or hw wouldn't have done what he did. I tried to explain to her that it's her he doesn't take seriosuly because he thinks I don't mind if he has his way with her but she didn't seem to get it. Besides, does it fucking matter? Isn't the point his inappropriate behavior?

The next day his wife texted me and asked if he acted stupidly. He claimed he had no memory of what happened but knew it must've been bad if I said it was. Bullshit. He started sobering up during those last few seconds. I was going to tell her everything but I like her and didn't want her to have to suffer needlessly...at this point. So, I told her that yes he had acted very stupidly. He became too embarrassed to hang out with us anymore. I'd finally had what I wanted! That traitorous punk-ass bitch was out of my life! Fuck him and fuck him often! WOOOO HOOOOO!!!!

He was gone and that was all that mattered.

Then dumb-ass went and texted him a few weeks later and told him it was okay. He was resistant but since he's in love with her, he relented predictably fast. Now I'm the asshole because I won't have anything to do with him.

Oh, but some of you "like" her, right? Then maybe you can explain what the fuck happened here and make it sound rational...